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shish
@yung_shishtov
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11 h |
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though i never want to admit it, my life feels like a fight for control against my job
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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31. sij |
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*employee giving out surveys at SFO* “wish i could just hit 65 and be done with this. I’m tired of working for the man - I’m ready for revolution... too old for old though”
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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31. sij |
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lately after drinking somewhat heavily i wake up at like 3:30am and my brain is GOING OFF - end up not being able to fall back asleep but i usually don't want to get out of bed either so i just lie there falling into thinky-holes
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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31. sij |
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getting in bed is always a kickstarter for this too (which is not great tbh because it typically makes it hard to fall asleep) but maybe i need to give myself more time prior to that to read some fiction or write (on paper!) or something
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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31. sij |
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being able to realize when its happening is pretty helpful i've found. extending the metaphor to a radio is kind of fun like you have to "tune in" to people
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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31. sij |
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hmm my working theory is it's probably due to some experience i've had in my past which i've sort of internalized as a belief/way of dealing with the world
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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27. sij |
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yeah i have blackout curtains and whatnot but i think it’s more about being outside and being able see the stars/hear the quiet. more of the feeling of stillness almost (maybe i can get better at cultivating this in the city but it’s much easier elsewhere)
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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27. sij |
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maybe something like a weighted blanket? honestly being out of a city has been helpful for me the past few weeks (obviously not always possible) but not hearing a siren every hour has felt very freeing
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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27. sij |
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hmm maybe still *doing* something but something more passive. e.g. going on a walk, listening to an album, hiking, wandering, etc. i find being in the shower stimulating in this way but that’s a huge waste of water (:
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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27. sij |
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definitely. curious how you're getting at "wasting more time". is it in the sense of not worrying about "being productive" and giving your thoughts/feelings space to lead you interesting places?
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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27. sij |
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i found this is a nice re-framing (but maybe just because "your feelings are valid" feels tired). also this thread is exactly why i have found twitter great. incredible amount of knowledge and references in here twitter.com/DRMacIver/stat…
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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26. sij |
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maybe once its actually spring and i know it'll soon be warm and green but in January it just makes me think of CLIMATE CHANGE
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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26. sij |
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oh man tweetdeck is a game changer
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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26. sij |
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this is quite a nice thought - good ailment for regret as well because even regrets lead you somewhere (hopefully better)
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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26. sij |
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as awe-inspiring and beautiful as snow is when it falls, it is equally as depressing when it starts to rain and snow starts to melt
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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24. sij |
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i know honestly but here we are!
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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24. sij |
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jhc... too real twitter.com/vgr/status/122…
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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24. sij |
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on a somewhat related note, if you told me i'd be tweeting quotes from The Interpretation of Dreams a few years ago i would've say you were crazy
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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24. sij |
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but now i realize this "watcher" scrambles my real thoughts in order to hide them. at some level, i didn't (don't) want to reveal what i'm really thinking bc that would reveal something about myself
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shish
@yung_shishtov
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24. sij |
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i can't count the number of conversations i've had where someone asks me "whatcha thinkin about" and my brain just turns to static. i used to think this was bc i was "bad at communicating" or the thought seemed to out of context to bring up or didn't want to ruin the mood
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