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Umar Khan
Comedian | Confused Person | Son of Disappointed Parents |
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Tweets
Umar Khan 14h
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Umar Khan retweeted
Tim Dillon Jun 17
“Watching women, people of color, or LGBTQ+ folks joke about straight white guys like myself not only makes me laugh, but helps me to keep my privilege in check.” -quote from an article about comedy. When a straight guy says something like this he’s raped no less than 5 people.
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Umar Khan retweeted
Tim Dillon Jun 17
Be clear: “Alternative” comedy is now defined as someone entertaining a room full of strangers for money in a comedy club. Mainstream comedy is everything else. Thanks!
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Umar Khan retweeted
Caleb Synan Jun 17
Wowww just had to unfollow OJ. He’s funny on twitter but give him a google and you will NOT like him anymore
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Umar Khan retweeted
DC Improv Jun 17
One month away: The Time Machine Roast returns to the Improv. Check out the greatest roast of all times ...
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Umar Khan Jun 16
On this let's celebrate men without reinforcing
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Umar Khan retweeted
Tim Dillon Jun 14
This was great. Big get for him.
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Umar Khan retweeted
Joe List Jun 13
Big forehead. Tonight Show 2018. I’m at in NYC July 12th & 13th. Come! Thanks.
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Umar Khan retweeted
mark normand Jun 12
Friend: I hate billionaires because they are addicted to money. They just want more. What about all the poverty out there? Me: By that logic you should hate fat people. They're addicted to food. What about all the starvation out there?
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Umar Khan retweeted
Nate Bargatze Jun 12
I'm not taking questions right now.
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Umar Khan Jun 12
Replying to @sasimons
Attacks and shaming don’t open conversations. They make people get defensive. Again sincere question: how interested are you in a real conversation about his positions ? Wouldn’t it be a better approach to say, this is how it comes off. Where are you coming from?
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Umar Khan Jun 12
Replying to @sasimons
Fair point. I can’t imagine a fair response to an unfairly written piece. Saying his moral barometer is off b/c he differs in comedic taste comes off as condescending. & telling him he don’t know how to do his job. It doesn’t read like someone who is open to a real conversation
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Umar Khan Jun 12
Replying to @sasimons
Sincere question: If you write a piece trashing someone and calling for that person, a black dude who worked his way out of the hood, to lose his job why is it weird when he trashed you back?
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Umar Khan Jun 11
Replying to @DanielleSATM
Come see me open for him in DC!
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Umar Khan retweeted
mark normand Jun 11
Holocaust photos are even more depressing when you remember the camera adds ten pounds.
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Umar Khan retweeted
Kyle Griffin Jun 11
Jon Stewart at a 9/11 victim fund hearing: "What an incredible metaphor this room is for the entire process that getting healthcare and benefits for 9/11 first responders has come to ... a filled room of 9/11 first responders and in front of me, a nearly empty Congress." Via ABC
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Umar Khan Jun 11
DC! Next weekend brings one of the best in this biz, , to
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Umar Khan retweeted
extremely online guy Jun 10
The only reason i won’t vote for Warren is because I feel it’s wrong (and colonialist) to impose democracy on a Native American. I want her to be president, but I want her to get there the right way: by peeling the skin off the skull of bernie sanders
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Umar Khan Jun 10
Replying to @aparnapkin
Great show. Super funny.
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Umar Khan Jun 7
Replying to @BmoreTheaterFan
I'll be back July!
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