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God
Unverified. Unverified. Thee/thou/thine.
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God 21h
I asked the devil if he bought Lindsay Graham’s soul and he said no, because it isn’t worth anything.
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God Dec 10
All good things must come to an end. Bad things though, they can go on forever.
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God Dec 9
The people who believe the world will end all at once will be the ones responsible for it ending gradually.
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God Dec 9
Most irons aren't made of iron, which ironically is both ironic and unironic.
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God Dec 8
Intelligence looks in a mirror and sees ignorance. Ignorance looks in a mirror and sees intelligence.
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God Dec 7
INDIA 1,300,000,000 people 330,000,000 gods 780 languages No sense of humour
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God Dec 6
Sure the Confederate flag is a symbol of slavery, racism and hatred, but it’s also a symbol of getting your ass kicked.
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God Dec 6
Guns don't kill people. Oh wait, they do.
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God retweeted
An Act Of God, London Dec 4
★★★★★ Five Stars from Broadway World "Zoe Lyons is diabolically glorious" is only at until 12 January. What are you waiting for? Tickets available:
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God Dec 3
Next time just dogs.
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God Dec 1
Only retweeting this can save you now.
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God Dec 1
Pretty much wherever on Earth the aliens land, when they say “Take me to your leader” you’re going to feel very embarrassed.
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God Dec 1
By 2030 it is essential that mankind reduce by 95% its total annual emission of bullshit.
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God Nov 29
It’s , so be sure to buy enough consumer goods to fill the spiritual vacuum sucking on your soul.
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God retweeted
God 22 Nov 18
This Thanksgiving I am grateful to everyone who doesn’t believe in Me for trying to keep the world safe from everyone who does.
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God Nov 27
Replying to @TheTweetOfGod
Also, "And I'm proud to be an American/Where at least I know I'm free" is patriotism at its lamest. "At least you know you're free?" As in, "Everything else in this country sucks but at least I share the same level of liberty as Europeans, Canadians, Japanese and half the world?"
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God Nov 27
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God Nov 26
I have chosen Donald Trump to be President because I strongly dislike Western civilization and wish it to end.
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God Nov 26
Attention U.K.: finally, just in time to be too late to do anything about Brexit, My play “An Act of God” starring opens Wednesday at ! Come see it! Audience members receive one (1) sin-free masturbation courtesy of the Author!
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God Nov 25
You are a device for your phone.
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