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Dévyan DuMon
*occasionally shouts into void* ... Comedian - Actor - Writer - Zen Buddha - Favorite Food: Junk
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14
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48
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Tweets
Dévyan DuMon Jul 6
Assholes @ lunch in 2022: "Do you have any Soylent Free options?" * this isn't about YOU, Celiacs ** I kno 4yrs dsnt seem like far enough away to start eating old ppl; "Soylent Green" is a '73 movie inspired by a '66 book, so flow w my artistic integrity, ya bastards
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 20
Replying to @realDonaldTrump
⚂ ... **Today, announced canceling appropriately abbreviated "BS", but guess what?? Damage already done, dumbass
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 20
Replying to @theRealDuMon
⚁ ...is going to do their psyche? You think adults are upset HERE, wtf do you think adults are feeling THERE!?! They're potentially CREATING the problem of neighboring terrorism over a piss-poor political strategy.
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 20
⚀ • Them: What's your opinion about ? • Me: Opinions are for Star Wars movies & cake v pie -THATs a Right/Wrong issue. Christ, Reds worry so much about terrorism, wtf do you think tearing a crying child from a family & putting them in cages on floor mats...
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 19
Q: Why'd they call him The LONE Ranger when he had a sidekick? A: (besides something adding a hyphen would fix -OR- "racism")
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 15
you may know who to ask... How are scientists JUST figuring out how spiders "fly", when the cartoon showed us in 1973? 🤔🔎 📰 TODAY: ⚖ 📺 Original Cartoon gif
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 12
s2e8 1) 👏🏾x8 Best. One. Yet 2) ⚡🔥🌋 3) language is 💛 4) I'm hybrid / from 5) I hate what progress did in - but w/out it would I be here TO hate it?
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 12
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 11
Replying to @amahnke @hardwick
Obviously perfect .. Jelly cause u beat me to it
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 11
's post "insensitive"? All I read was a HUGE fan, in mourning, typing out words to make sense of the non-sensical There are 5 stages of grief you motherfuckers - "being understanding right away" & "sharing the hotline" are none of them
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 9
Some of y'all surprised about /vegeterians spittin' venom @ statim postmortem ... Ummm, well was ALSO a , so yeah .. those motherfuckers can be ruthless
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 7
Ummm, you guys ... I JUST realized that on (America's Got Talent) - NONE of the judges are American 😆😂🤣🤣💀 🇬🇧 🇩🇪 🇬🇧 🇨🇦
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Dévyan DuMon Jun 6
Wouldn't it be sublime, Just all kinds of great, If someday we found out, Rumi's last name was "Nate"?
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Dévyan DuMon May 25
Today at work, a woman TOTALLY mislabeled me as a misogynist Geez ... what a bitch
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Dévyan DuMon May 23
Worth EVERY paper cut .. MAXIMUM EFFORT!! 🙏🏾🚫🍋 **it was my Mom's idea to put my head on his shoulder .. not even kidding
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Dévyan DuMon May 22
@ the White House? Oh y'know just Mother Earth tryna send 45 to the depths of Hades to finish out his term (if you believe in that sorta thing .. which I don't .. but still tho .. 🤞🏽) 🙄
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Dévyan DuMon May 14
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Dévyan DuMon May 8
OF COURSE the fair-skinned would do a study on what happens to our when it dies 1) The Irish LOVE a good wake 2) They ARE bummed it's gonna take 5 billion years, tho .. "Fookin spayt it oop allrrrety!!" (typin Irish ain't ez, y'all)
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Dévyan DuMon May 4
Her last name IS Wolf, & ppl are surprised she drew blood? 🤔 tsk-fuckin-tsk America Everyone w a lick o' comedic sense knows there were PLENTY of other jokes if Michelle's GOAL was viciousness.. Errbody else can suck 🐓
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Dévyan DuMon May 1
Umm.. MAYBE they just wanted the tiger to have a chance at a better life living the American dream. To grow up and join a magic act, like the White tigers .. no, wait .. (Deferred Action for Tigercub Arrivals) 🤓
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