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pete
3,557
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206
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385
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Tweets
pete Aug 21
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pete Aug 21
setting up a joke where you might die before the punchline lands is incredible. i have dedicated my life to the residents of 1969 new hampshire
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pete Aug 19
sometimes you gotta give your best shit away and make it much less mean
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pete Aug 19
Replying to @MattJRoberto
never forget
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pete Aug 18
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pete Aug 18
it’s a long story but i one time got a rock in my face which caused all the saliva in my face to get backed up which caused this swelling and i love this part of my life
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pete Aug 16
i think about this tweet a lot. all the words in it are perfectly chosen and true and kind also the pats are a wagon again
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pete Aug 16
what a fucking loser
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pete Aug 15
the most charming scene: luke wilson: no ones called me a butthead since the 9th grade reese witherspoon (inexplicably speaking in a thick alabama accent for the first and only time in the movie): mayyybe not to yer fayyyyce
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pete Aug 15
legally blonde one is an elite courtroom movie probably top 3
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pete Aug 14
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pete Aug 13
i was trying to find that gif of me and stool carrabis but i gave up
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pete Aug 12
heard clowney is on the trading block i think the patriots should trade ryan mallett for him texans need a qb and bill belichick loves versatile defenders
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pete Aug 11
the absolute worst
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pete Aug 11
“she can’t get to school now” any other person in the world would have botched that line delivery but not this guy 10/10 video
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pete Aug 11
i’m surprised this isn’t a very famous poster this should replace james dean smoking a cigarette at a piano or endless summer as the official poster of a freshman dorm
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pete Aug 11
Replying to @PRINCEW1LL1AM
please dm me your address so i can send you some always great to meet a fan
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pete Aug 9
far be it from me to defend taylor swift but you’re just upset because she’s blond and reminds you of brandy who left your broke ass for joe dirt...period
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pete Aug 8
the patriots are back praise
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pete Aug 7
Replying to @Bobby_Tay10
no i’m anti really bad stories the office was funny
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