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Scarlett Parrish
Half woman, half unicorn, half potato.
21,233
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Scarlett Parrish retweeted
Mark Hebden 8h
I have a friend who lives just outside Chernobyl in Ukraine. He watched that drama and said he counted 9 historical inaccuracies on one hand.
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Scarlett Parrish 3h
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Scarlett Parrish 3h
Replying to @ApocalypseNyet
Okay so I'm hardly fat, just a little rounded in certain areas, but as I've just said to my fellow HobNob goblin, , I need the round hips so Tom Ellis has something to grab a hold of when he gives me a violent beasting.
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
Apparently I'm out of HobNobs because some fat bastard (who is me) has polished off the rest of the packet.
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
Replying to @swtpoizn
It is indeed who you're thinking of.
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
Replying to @StillNotSam
Money?
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
Replying to @JenniferRNN
IT WAS MY STICKY MILK AND I'LL BARF IT IF I WANT TO.
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
My creative swearing and insults have received a lot of comments on Twitter so I'm tempted to write a heroine who swears as much as I do.
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
Replying to @JenniferRNN
STICKY MILK, JENNIFER.
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
If you want to read the first chapter of FAMILY JEWELS, a touching tale of a man putting his ding-a-ling in a lady's front bottom and wiggling it about a bit until it barfs up sticky milk, lookee hyuh:
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Scarlett Parrish 4h
Replying to @LambertLane19
Oh, you! You're too nice to me. :D
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Scarlett Parrish 5h
Replying to @swtpoizn
I shall henceforth call that move AN UNINTENTIONAL BENSON.
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Scarlett Parrish 5h
Here's a YouTube documentary. For research. :D
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Scarlett Parrish 5h
Replying to @MPAVictoria
Yes, I do. In the living room.
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Scarlett Parrish 5h
Well that's strange, Wiki says two but I'm SURE I've read somewhere he killed three. Maybe it's one of those cases where "We know he did a 3rd but we can't prove it."
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Scarlett Parrish 5h
Heath got three, but they were BDSM-related, so lots of whips and kinky sex in hotel rooms. You are welcome.
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Scarlett Parrish 5h
There's a book called "Handsome Brute" about the Neville Heath case.
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Scarlett Parrish 6h
I say, I say, I say, - how do you know your man has a high sperm count? You have to chew before you swallow! Ba-doom TISH!
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Scarlett Parrish 6h
Oh, and there's a passing connection with Neville Heath. His brother came to the aid of Percy Thompson as he lay dying, as the Heath family lived on the same street, or in the same part of London.
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Scarlett Parrish 6h
TECHNICALLY NO. But you still pass the death test and may still call yourself my murdertwin. (Bywaters did it, Thompson got the death penalty for more or less asking "Why did you do it, Freddie?" thereby "proving" foreknowledge.)
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