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Adnams Southwold 10h
Hi- we proved yesterday that there is a real person behind our tweets- one who is not a football fan (of any colour)
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Mike Vogel Turkey Nov 16
When you rewatch more than 1000000 times...... 😂
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Graham Kennedy 10m
When you realise you've forgotten to buy a birthday present...
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HSM 26m
My talents include: -Procrastinating -Eating -Sarcasm ermm and that's about it....
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Brooke Smith Nov 17
Couple arrested after hibiscus plants were mistaken for marijuana! I may have some 'splaing to do if my insurance agent comes to my house.
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Crystal Miesseau 8h
Replying to @ChloeMugg
LOL my Nan thought I weaned Gracie at 9 months. yesterday someone told her I posted on Facebook she she was 22 months still breastfed.
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Dara 52m
Ever go to a car, try to unlock it and then realize it isn’t yours.... I did !!!!
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sly 9h
Okay my new girl crush is Camila Cabello. But I've only been watching Slegdehammer performances. 😓 As In, her Fifth Harmony era.
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Conor Mohan Nov 17
Just sold a freshly 21 yo his first drink. Probably should have carded him
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Katie Quinn Nov 15
That moment when you’re shouting wheeeeeee driving around the corner & the pedestrians on the side of the road hear you
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äññå 19h
sober me gets caught in so many drunk lies I've told lol
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Louis Holzman Nov 17
When you don’t realize you’re using the women’s bathroom until you’re already in the stall and you hear the ladies talking 💩
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Tome of Voice Nov 17
So I recently killed a minor beholder by feeding it to a Bag of Devouring. The gnome in our party accidentally went with it.
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samantha alaimo Nov 17
Went a little overboard with my highlight today to hide the huge bags under my eyes
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Starkat15 Nov 16
The setting: Me, struggling to answer our newish work phones. I'm switching back and forth between the lines but it won't let me pick up the call. Me, frustrated, yells: JUST ANSWER IT!! I realize I already had, and was on speaker phone.
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michelle g 13h
Replying to @ms_moneyybagz
You’re a stronger woman than me and I’m a $50 tab in and he had 3 beers... 🤷🏼‍♀️
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Katie Marie Nov 17
Getting something for a Christmas present off of Facebook market place and the lady tells me we get meet at Olive Garden. I️ say ok 10:00 am. Now I’m here in an empty parking lot waiting for her 😳
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Becca Wheelis Nov 16
Two year hiatus from twitter and I’ve forgotten how to use it 🤷🏻‍♀️
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courteney Nov 14
I've been in Edmonton for just under two days and I've already run two red lights 😅🙄
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leahb Nov 18
Only I could miss the coach for Birmingham for it to PICK ME UP AT MY HOUSE
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