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Maddie 31 May 12
Just saw a chicken chasing a squirrell....
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Photon Ron 14 Oct 18
9.) Your boy was right, Photon Ron is now glucose, but if it’s just sugar so we’re good
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Amy Steinman 17 Jun 13
According to How The Universe Works we discover 1 new planet a week on avg, and they all are biological hells..
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mr kelly 2 Jan 16
Fata Morgana is a beautiful rare sight to see. Stoked to have a picture of it!
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suz haugh 20 Feb 13
I just had to google "Harlem Shake". How does everyone everywhere know about stuff and I'm late on everything?
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Dave Medina 17 Dec 14
The irony here? People are probably gonna *hack* into networks just to see "The Interview."
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thegreycomedian Sep 18
I didn't know you were supposed to use hastags
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Blake 29 Mar 15
Replying to @RussellJeron
also weird how people get so emotional when their dictator dies.
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Ryan Hart 23 Aug 11
Earthquake felt as far as Boston?....Im before Boston and I didnt feel shit! It has to go through me to get to Boston!
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Drojo 4 Sep 14
Why is it called if it contains seven vegetables and one fruit -- and that fruit accounts for 87% of its volume?
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Daniel Townsend 13 Dec 11
apparently I need a new ID. Goodnight to the 41 poeple outta 7 billion out there.
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fiona kennedy 11 Oct 12
: we could be floating upside down right now ” will you go out with me?
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Mr. Awesome 19 Aug 16
I've been trying to keep things positive and stress-free lately. It's been sort of a mixed bag. :)
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Leah Colley Oct 17
You ever have to explain the tides to a little kid? It makes you feel like a liar, even though you are 100% telling the truth: kid: “Where did all the water go?” me: “Well, the moon makes all the water in the ocean go far away twice a day-“
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davethegreat 9 Nov 11
Reading my old travel diaries. . . there are a hell of a lot of really horrible things in really pretty places.
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Daniel Tracy 20 Feb 12
People still support Chris Brown?
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sloppysurfer 1 Jul 17
Yo Ass Eatin Dinner While My Ass Tryna Sleep 5 O'clock In The Morning 😂🤦🏾‍♂️
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Martawesome reeder 26 Nov 12
Replying to @countrywinston
also a song exists that sings about how a vagina tastes like pepsi Cola and it's not a joke
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Shir 19 Sep 14
"Neck ties?" "Kind of like pet ownership, but we're the chiwawa and 19th century Victorian traditions are walking us"
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Shir 19 Sep 14
Martian: "And what is 'pet ownership'?" "Well we kinda decided at some point that if it's small and fury it must love us"
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