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Keith Senior 🏉 1h
Not sure about that MVP medal presentation!!!! 😳
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77ParaBatalion 17m
Replying to @samsado2016
The demo flopped. It lacked objectivity. You were denied license because you were on hire from your Masters and the security apparatus knew it.And pliz Kindly tell the lady to practice how to speak in front of a camera.
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Amanda 19h
I'm currently experiencing the struggle where I want more 'weeb' friends, but then when I actually find said weebs, I'm like that fucking dog that gets too excited around other dogs and vomits. Why am I like this?! 😳
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MiseEire 3h
Saw a particular local election candidate leaving polling station yday with family members including spouse. Presumably had just cast votes. Looks like that candidate received ONE vote in that polling station.....eek. We did reduce the wait times for Divorce however..
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Ariella, PhD 4m
Out at a festival and there are folks here trying to get attendees to sign a petition to “save the electoral college”. Then talks about how purple Colorado has gotten and that’s bad.
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Louise🔥 21h
And the world stopped when I was hit🤣
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Emanuel🇪🇹 May 21
Y I come into the kitchen for a midnight snack and stumble into my daughter mid date night
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Michedragon 53m
Nobody ask me what this is. I really don't know. I just got excited for cereal.
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Bruno J. Rodriguez 3h
*Yesterday at a restaurant* Employee: “Would you like some beans with your meal sir?” Me: “Yes pl-“ Manager:”IM NOT MAKING BEANS AT THIS TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!@-&/!3@:” Employee: 😶 Me:😶 My friend:😶 The other employees:😶 The beans:😶 Mexican food:😶 God:😶
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Jordan Harrison 2h
I just walked in on a child in the bathroom... a little boy in fact...I feel like a bad person. In my defence the door was unlocked but it was still
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Stephen Moore 8h
The way I ran into my boss’s ex-husband last night 😬😐 lol
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Elixa May 24
That moment when your waiter introduces himself and you Introduce yourself back....
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Sophie Dancaster May 24
When you get confused as a high school student
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effective proposal framework 4h
Wow. Back in the days before IT geekdom I used to tweet & blog as probation officer @zoestaffsgmpt and whaddaya know; I just found my last ever blog on here?! And, ironically; I moaned about IT
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Jordie Pierce 2h
I knew today was gonna be a . Cuz after I took a crap the toilet paper 🧻 was the shape of the unicorn emoji 🦄 id show you a pic but I think this post is enough
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Sarah Peles May 21
Patient: Aww a baby bump. Me: Nope, Chipotle.
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ian wang May 24
The 5th most awkward interaction humans can have: someone walks past in the hall way and tries to give you a High five but you just got out of the bathroom and you have to explain why your hands are wet.
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Nick Carraway 22h
My neighbor asked me to set him up with my cousin...
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Joëlle Pastora Sala 1h
That moment when you call out the LC cashier for asking you for ID when you’re over 30 & say “i know, it’s because I have major hormonal acne.”
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Dan 14h
And that's 0 from 4.
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