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Saucisse ソーセージ Feb 20
Been wondering why I couldn’t sleep the last few nights. Just spotted on my cold capsule packaging - caffeine !!!! 🤪🤪
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Charlotte Frost ❄️ Feb 20
Today I dropped a brand new book into the toilet 📖🚽💦
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Andy Wood 17h
But Scotland can’t join the EU
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Fulham Pete Feb 19
Replying to @whanie49 @Chloe_gee00
Had 4-0 to sundyland
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Green4#PeoplesVote🌻🇬🇧🇮🇪🇪🇺💚 Feb 20
So, just as we find out that the insect population is collapsing, some bright 'entrepreneur' comes up with the idea of feeding livestock reared for meat consumption on insect protein.
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lee kynaston Feb 16
Replying to @LukeStephensMUA
Very Homer Simpson no?
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Van Smith Feb 20
Who knew using the oven’s self-cleaning function is likely to break the oven? Not I. Don’t be me.
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Jacob Stoudinger Feb 15
Almost game time.
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Mohammed patel 22h
Lol there's always a tweet
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HighlandArab 17h
“He will do all he can to avoid a No Deal Brexit” ..... except resign obviously If May said she would consider it if he ran down Oxford Street at rush hour in his pants loudly singing ‘Donald Whar’s Yir Troosers’ would he do it to avoid a No Deal Brexit?
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OffensiveAmerican 7h
The . A new hairstyle that incorporates braided rope.
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Liz Beresford-Davis 13h
Just went to put some frozen peas in with the boiling pan of rice, slipped, and drenched the kitchen/cooker in frozen peas!! Must remember to pull the cooker out after we've eaten, and rescue all those that shot down the back ☹️
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Franco Caliz Feb 20
Anyone know the wifi password. I missed it during the speech.
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Kyndra Feb 16
Another . The second one this week. Not a good way to start a lazy 3 day weekend.
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Kandii Kiss 14h
My clumsy ass broke not only my cell phone tripod, but my selfie stick in the last week.
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Dr. EJ O'Dell Feb 18
Replying to @KollockShepard
I ate my piece.
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Suzanne Culshaw Feb 17
As per 's tweet below which I hadn't seen before I posted...
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Mohammad Gorjestani 16h
Replying to @mogorjestani
DAMN IT WHEN WILL EDITING COME TO TWITTER! I meant *OPINIONS* not OPTIONS
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Dunns IV I VI 🇨🇦 Feb 19
Replying to @cdnpolinews
I know come on..... Unless it has a knife & it's got your cornered... #416
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Dan Cecil Feb 19
👍 for the change vehicle feature in after I selected my wife’s car instead!
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