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falfans🦜 3 Jun 15
So cold I have on two shirts a sweatshirt and a jacket. Some jackass just walked by in shorts and a tank top.
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MoonLily 24 Oct 11
Me who owns no warm clothes is helping my mother shop for jumpers.
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Emily Bagwell 17 Jun 14
Traffic was so bad my GPS asked if I wanted to switch to pedestrian mode. 😒😒😒
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Kristopher Karcher 12 Jul 14
*Goes to Signature Theatre to try to get tickets for .* *Theyre sold out* *Comes home to find they followed me* ?
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Laura Sillett 6 Mar 16
When you're doing sit-ups and your cat firstly sits on you and then lies on its back next to you...
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Alison Sykora 7 Sep 12
It's a little weird when you see that you've been retweeted by a bunch of complete strangers.
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Braindead 19 Jul 14
@Ms_Firecracka lmaoooo 🎩 perfect ole chap. The balloon though.
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Mackenzie Brooke 10 Feb 14
Why does flappy bird change colors?
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Katelyn Rutland 21 Jun 12
"Oh really? Maybe you should have gotten out and said 'Wanna pray together? For our future?' " -
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𝓀𝒾𝒶𝓃𝒶. 25 Jan 13
HAPPY BIRTHDAY . Even if you didn't invite me to go clubbing tonight, i still love you! Hahah😂😘
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Erica Leonard 20 Mar 13
And then she retweets me just to rub it in my face @annahfrank ??!!??
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Adam “Van Gogh” Carlson 25 Mar 17
17!? Yall seriously need to visit the original AO... ? ?
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Old Man Sam 29 Dec 10
Master of disguise is so underrated! The Napoleon Dynamite of it's time!
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DJ Spin 25 Jun 14
Verizon just pushed KitKat (4.4.2) to my S3 ... Thanks, just in time for my eligible upgrade in 3 weeks
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Nico 14 Feb 11
is it hard to believe i am single since birth? someone can't e... Lol
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chloe gordon 12 Dec 13
fb is trying to get me to record my relationship status. they clearly haven't researched me thoroughly.
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Merritt Jones 22 Mar 13
I just got an email asking if I wanted to be in a spelling bee...
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Adriana Burkhart 27 Jun 14
HAHAHAHA FUNNY JOKE FORTUNE FACTORY
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awĸward eqυeѕтrιan 4 Oct 12
The equestrian fashion trend is honestly the most annoying thing ever to equestrians. ?
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Gejimayu Tsamsiyu 5 Mar 12
Today said if I were to ever finally confess that I'm a lesbian, I had to start by saying "Lezzbehonest"
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