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T. Greg Doucette
Ex-computer scientist, now criminal defense attorney & host of . Dog lover. conservative. Proud alum of and .
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
OC_uNderCover🖕 30m
Replying to @greg_doucette
Why did you stop me, I'm not discussing my day or eve. Am I free to go or being detained, if detained SHUT the fuck up
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Jedi McBeardface 30m
Replying to @greg_doucette
Hi, I'm a stay-at-home dad. You may know me from my greatest hits, including: ➡️"We need to leave, put your shoes on." ➡️"Pick up your Legos." ➡️"Share the Switch or I turn it off." and ➡️"WE NEED TO LEAVE, PUT YOUR SHOES ON!"
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Freedom & Whisky 🇮🇪🇺🇸🥃 24m
Replying to @greg_doucette @amyep9
There are many reasons to hate Law & Order, but my favorite is the inculcation of the myth that cops INVARIABLY recite the Miranda warning verbatim the second they slap the cuffs on you.
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Nick Treuheit 13m
Replying to @greg_doucette
I'm a biochemist, you may know me from my greatest hits including: "Do you have any idea how complicated your blood is?", to "No, vitamin C is not a magical panacea" to "Actually, proteins do all sorts of cool stuff....hey, wake up"
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Nick Brown 26m
Hi, I'm a software engineer. You may know me from my hot singles "No I can't fix your computer", "No, taking a two week class on the Internet probably won't be enough for your nephew to land a programming job", and "Yeah you probably shouldn't have downloaded that attachment".
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Richard Naik 11m
Hi, I'm a System Administrator. You might remember me from: -"no, you can't have root access" -"no, you can't open that to the public internet" -"no, we can't just shut it off over the weekend" -"no, the Cloud will not do everything I do for pennies on the dollar"
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Conspicuously Smooth 38m
Replying to @greg_doucette
Hi, I'm a web developer. You may know me from my greatest hits including: "you can't clone facebook in a week," "you don't get 90% of the company just because you are the 'idea guy'," and "no, I don't know how to get viruses off your computer"
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Ramon Contreras 38m
Hi, I'm a SEO manager. You may know me from my greatest hits including: ➡️ "Why is your robots.txt file blocking all bots and crawlers?" ➡️ "Did you apply the proper redirects after you built your new website?" ➡️ "you don't need the words 'near me' on your page" ➡️ "it depends"
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T. Greg Doucette retweeted
Jennifer Thorne-In-Your-Side 40m
Hi, I work in pharma clinical trials. You may know me from my greatest hits "No, we aren't hiding the cure for cancer", "Sorry Dad, I can't tell you about the new blockbuster in the pipeline" and "Please, vaccinate your kids".
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T. Greg Doucette 41m
Replying to @greg_doucette
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T. Greg Doucette 42m
Replying to @greg_doucette
Basically. Part of why my best clients are street pharmacists, they don't base their strategy on Law & Order episodes or what Bubba and Pookie told them from when they did a bid.
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T. Greg Doucette 44m
Replying to @greg_doucette
Hand to God Even the ones in custody – where custodial interrogation applies – will still answer questions, not realizing police don't need their statements once the drugs are found
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T. Greg Doucette 48m
Replying to @greg_doucette
We call this "addition by subtraction"
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T. Greg Doucette 50m
Replying to @greg_doucette
Holy f*ck. The number of times I've done a consult where the guy's like "yeah I told them everything before I was arrested, b/c I figured they can't use it if they didn't Mirandize me"...
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T. Greg Doucette 52m
Hi, I'm a criminal defense attorney. You may know me from my greatest hits including: ➡️ "it depends" ➡️ "no, they actually don't have to read you your Miranda rights" and ➡️ "yes, you really should remain silent" (with the "shut the f*ck up" remix)
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T. Greg Doucette 1h
Replying to @greg_doucette
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T. Greg Doucette 1h
Replying to @greg_doucette
Precisely why I moved down to North Carolina rather than up to New York
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T. Greg Doucette 1h
Replying to @greg_doucette
And yet you're still camped out in my mentions, like a little groupie desperate for attention
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T. Greg Doucette 1h
Replying to @greg_doucette
The high schoolers were attacked with clubs now
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T. Greg Doucette 1h
Replying to @greg_doucette
Had my scarf around my face walking the dog this morning when it was 14°. Ended up with ice from exhaling
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