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Boring James Milner
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Boring James Milner Dec 2
I just text Virgil Van Dijk asking him to congratulate Lionel Messi for me. He said Not now James.
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Boring James Milner Nov 27
I just asked Dejan Lovren if he knew I’d made more assists than any other player in the Champions League in the last 3 seasons. He said no. I said well I have. I’ve made 11. He said really? I said yeah, I’ve been keeping count.
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Boring James Milner Oct 21
Thanks Patrice. I nearly choked on my tea when I heard you say this.
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Boring James Milner Oct 20
I'm so excited for today's match at Old Trafford. I've already had 5 cups of tea. I didn't use 5 different tea bags though. I reused a couple of them.
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Boring James Milner Oct 5
Still over the moon with my 93rd minute winning penalty against Leicester today. Now to keep the party going by getting home and giving the kitchen floor a good clean.
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Boring James Milner Oct 5
I'm really happy I scored that 93rd minute penalty because if I didn't, we would have drawn that match. So it was a good job I did.
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Boring James Milner Oct 5
Jürgen Klopp just said to me You're starting as captain today James. I said Me? He said Yes. I said Captain? He said Yes. I said Ok.
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Boring James Milner Oct 2
Jordan Henderson just said What a game that was. I said Tell me about it Jordan. I didn't expect Genk to hold out for a 0-0 draw against Napoli either.
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Boring James Milner Sep 28
I’ve had words with Jurgen, I said We can’t play that badly every week if we want to win the league. He said Thanks James. I said Because we’ll be punished against better opposition. He said Yes, thanks James. I said No problem.
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Boring James Milner Sep 28
I just told Dean Henderson not to worry about his huge mistake that may gift us the title despite being on loan from Man Utd as it could've happened to anyone. He said Thanks, James.
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Boring James Milner Sep 22
I just said to Jürgen, this is a big game isn’t it. He said Yes. I said We need to be winning these types of games if we are serious about winning the league. He said I know James. I said Good.
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Boring James Milner Sep 22
With all the stress of the Chelsea game today I’ve lost the spare key for my front door. Luckily I have a spare spare key that I can promote to spare key, it just means I’ll have to get a new spare spare key.
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Boring James Milner Aug 29
What a mix up I’ve just had. I text Divock Origi to ask him if he was looking forward to going back to Belgium to play Gent. He said don’t you mean Genk. I said Yes, sorry I mean Genk.
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Boring James Milner Aug 25
Sensational, breathtaking and legendary. What an unbelievable innings from Jack Leach. 1 run from 17 deliveries takes a remarkable amount of skill.
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Boring James Milner Aug 15
Dejan Lovren asked me how I looked so ripped at 33 years old. I said I eat healthily. He said Ok. I said I don't drink. He said Ok. I said I go to the gym. He said Ok I get it thanks for that. I said No worries.
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Boring James Milner Aug 14
I just asked Adrián if he was nervous for tonight's Super Cup. He said No more than normal James. How come? I said because Alisson's are big shoes to fill. I wouldn't want to make a mistake if I was you. He said Thanks for that James. I said Not a problem.
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Boring James Milner Aug 9
I just said to Jurgen, We should be beating Norwich tonight, they’ve just been promoted and we are European Champions. There’s really no excuse. He said Yes James, I know.
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Boring James Milner Aug 9
I just asked Jürgen Klopp if he was excited for the new season. He said What do you think James? I said I think you are.
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Boring James Milner Jul 23
Am I getting mugged off here?
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Boring James Milner Jun 3
Second morning in a row I’ve woken up with a sore head. I love my cups of tea but this is getting silly now, I need to stop celebrating.
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