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Kayleigh D.
|| || || millennial with vague aspirations 🍾
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Oren John 2h
Thankful the timing for my fatherhood came at exactly at the right time for hypebeast dad chic; I can wear carharts, flip flops and aloha print and as long as there’s a balenciaga dad hat or yeezy involved the youth still give daps
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Italian Elon Musk 17h
[when I get my verified checkmark removed by Twitter for doing a bit where Elon Musk is Italian] ayyyy whoopsy daisy
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Aparna Nancherla 3h
in honor of father’s day, turn off google maps and ask your nearest dad for directions
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
urbanJAP 8h
Happy Father’s Day to the only man who is required to answer my panic texts ❤️
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
NYT Archives 6h
Lady Liberty arrived in New York on this day in 1885.
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Samantha Ruddy Jun 16
I saw a strip club across the street from a minigolf place and I’m liberal but that’s too much for me. What if you’re just trying to have a nice afternoon with your family then your kids look across the street and have to see a bunch of losers playing minigolf?
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
hell woods Jun 15
u know you're a grown ass woman when u can look your dad in the eye and turn down the thermostat
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Patrick Monahan 19h
I love to sleep in apparently a slightly wrong position and have searing neck pain for the next several days.
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Elaine Hendrix Jun 15
I will ship every one of you brats off to Switzerland. 😈
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Daniel Kibblesmith ☃️ Jun 16
Eleanor Roosevelt was too busy fighting segregation, writing a syndicated column for 30 years, earning 35 honorary degrees and flying with Amelia Earhart but cool that we finally have a First Lady who never talks but has perfect eyebrows.
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Kayleigh D. 10h
I really hope a “Darwin Award” stamp exists for occasions such as this so ME’s don’t even have to bother writing the autopsy report, they can just stamp it and everyone will nod and move on.
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Zack Bornstein Jun 16
Remember when people didn’t vote bc they said there was no difference between Hillary and Trump, and now there are child concentration camps
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Danez Smith Jun 16
What a weekend. Incredibles 2 was incredible af, Beyoncé album featuring Jay Z, I went grocery shopping AND did laundry? Slow down Jesus.
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
christine teigen 13h
Replying to @chrissyteigen
Also I am less of a Neanderthal than 89% of you (NEW BIO ALERT)
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
ESPN Jun 16
25 years later, The Sandlot crew is still getting killed by Smalls 😂
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Amanda Mull Jun 16
My fav thing to do after buying groceries is decide whether I should go out to dinner with friends or order some takeout
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Bodega Cats Jun 16
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Ike Barinholtz Jun 16
*Puts a megaphone in front of a mic that is connected to a thousand speakers pointed at the Grand Canyon* YOUR CAMPAIGN MANAGER IS CURRENTLY IN JAIL
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Andy’s Diary Jun 16
I call her Debbie. But when I introduce her, I call her Blondie. But Blondie is the name of the whole band, so... 6/16/79
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Kayleigh D. retweeted
Impossible Cool. Jun 16
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