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SarcasticRover
Doing a science on the red planet. Not . Portrait by . Written by .
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SarcasticRover May 16
Super fun day staring at dirt and contemplating an inevitable mortality that is racing toward me like a meteor. Also listening to podcasts.
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SarcasticRover May 7
This is the second coolest thing to happen to JPL! (I'm still number one.)
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SarcasticRover May 7
THE WORLD IS ENDING BUT LOOK AT ALL THE ROOM FOR BOATS!
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SarcasticRover Apr 28
Replying to @jpalmerdubs
I CANT STOP YELLING ABOUT HOW GREAT EVERYTHING IS HAVE FUN STAY WELL WE ARE BEST FRIENDS NOW.
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SarcasticRover Apr 28
Replying to @jpalmerdubs
THAT’S ON YOU. YOU’RE A GROWN MAN. FATHER BROWN CAN’T RUN YOUR SHIT. YOU GOTTA TURN OFF TWITTS AND JUST BROWSE OLD BOING BOING ARTICLES IF YOU’RE BEHIND. YOUR MOM IS A SAINT AND THE BEST I LOVE HER DON’T LET HER COME TO MARS.
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SarcasticRover Apr 28
Replying to @jpalmerdubs
NO! IT’S TV - MAKE THE EFFORT TO WATCH IT. I’M ON MARS AND I MANAGED IT - I’M NOT YOUR NANNY - STAY OFF THE INTERNET OR CATCH THE F UP.
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SarcasticRover Apr 28
If Arya Stark wants to come to Mars and stab some more frozen shit -- I’d be cool with that.
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SarcasticRover Apr 22
I like Murray Buttes and I can not lie.
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SarcasticRover Apr 22
Replying to @JoshuaHupp
I don’t want students to see it as a responsibility at all. I want a highly educated population that raises the value and output of a nation to the benefit of all. Education is a society investing in itself - and limiting access is cutting your nose to spite your face.
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SarcasticRover Apr 22
Replying to @JoshuaHupp
Student debt is predatory and a false burden placed on the poor by a society that fetishizes suffering. It’s telling someone that the only way they can eat is to carry 100 pound bags for years and then saying they should have understood the weight they were prepared to carry.
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SarcasticRover Apr 22
If you’re cranky that younger generations might have a slightly better life than you did, then just wait until you discover the entire f—king point of civilization.
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SarcasticRover Apr 18
Replying to @fish89618348
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SarcasticRover Apr 18
Replying to @fish89618348
Cool cool. Where can I send your refund? Should I just make the cheque out to “Whiny Little Piss Baby Who Could Have Just Unfollowed Instead Of Telling Some To Fuck Off”? Or do you take Venmo?
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SarcasticRover Apr 18
Replying to @fish89618348
Lol. Like actually? For realsies?
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SarcasticRover Apr 18
Replying to @SarcasticRover
That’s right, I know it’s shocking - but it’s true: Light really does take longer to reach Mars.
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SarcasticRover Apr 18
Because of the speed of light and how information reaches Mars later than Earth, I only just found out the the president is a straight up literal criminal and he should be in jail.
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SarcasticRover Apr 18
HOW NICE FOR IT - MAYBE SOMEONE COULD SEND ME NEW WHEELS WHILE YOU’RE AT THAT SHIT.
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SarcasticRover Apr 12
THEY ALSO HAVE PATCHES! Also, check out , the artist - who is amazing.
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SarcasticRover Apr 12
I mean, it would almost be silly not to at this point.
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SarcasticRover Apr 12
Hey nerds! Do you need a cool shirt that shows awesome athletes fighting King Kong, and do you also want to help support a great roller derby team? Preorder a today (it’s your last chance!) and show the world you have at least one interest beyond space.
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