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Tim Bridge
Vermont's Funniest Comedian 2017 // The Barenaked Ladies of People // Dogs // Comedy // Dogs
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Tim Bridge Dec 12
Is this relatable?
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Tim Bridge retweeted
Kalisto Zenda Nanen Dec 8
rt if you've ever: - self-harmed - attempted suicide - been to a therapist - cancelled on things because you don't have the energy to live - lied about being okay - had a panic attack in a public bathroom the world needs to know how common these things are.
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Tim Bridge retweeted
dirt prince ⚫️ Dec 3
i’m like that girl who spent one semester abroad and now it’s her personality but with the mental hospital
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Tim Bridge retweeted
Brendel Dec 1
Kid: Santa, what's the story of your reindeer names? Santa: Why I name them after memories, like Prancer frolicking through the snow! Kid: What about Donner? *a dark countenance settles on Santa's face* Santa: the year was 1847, snowfall had trapped us in the Sierra Nevada-
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Tim Bridge Dec 3
Replying to @Schepizza
They did it this time though they implied him and Putin are having (GAY) sex! Good luck recovering now, Cheeto-boy LMAO
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Tim Bridge Dec 3
In an alternate universe where everyone’s names are slightly different, Doughey Zechanel awakens early to set up the bowls for her YouTube baking channel.
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Tim Bridge Dec 2
Is Col. Mustard a play on General Custer?
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Tim Bridge Dec 1
Replying to @bernybelvedere
Can you explain to me how you bullying a teen for what he looks like isn’t you actively participating in the incivility you’re whining about happening on the left?
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Tim Bridge Nov 29
True love is being fine with your dog liking her more than you, but true love is also being fine with how you're allergic to both her cats... wait, hang on, I've been BAMBOOZLED!
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Tim Bridge Nov 29
Replying to @PFTompkins
"Can we please get back to not talking and me knowing things because I know everything except for talking?"
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Tim Bridge retweeted
Samantha Ruddy Nov 26
I still maintain that older white ladies are super Christian because praying is the ultimate form of calling a manager. If the protagonist of Are You There God? It’s Me Margaret was in her 60s it would be called Excuse Me God? This is Unacceptable.
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Tim Bridge Nov 25
Replying to @pattern_monster
Yore
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Tim Bridge Nov 25
Replying to @MichelleButeau
You’re open bar wedding good.
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Tim Bridge Nov 24
is such a phenomenally funny and warm performer and her presence is so positively comforting that she’s the first person I’ve not been annoyed at flat-out, to-my-goddamn-face calling me Harry Potter. A+. Come back to VT.
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Tim Bridge Nov 15
Replying to @HahaTimBridge
This is bad I should pay attention. Took me like five minutes of what I assume is a great set to tweet this from the back of the room pls help.
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Tim Bridge Nov 15
You guys ever been at a comedy show where there’s a group of like ten white bro dudes and you’re way more interested in taking a full tally of what they laugh and don’t laugh at (because you think that’d make a solid Vox article) than the comedy show itself?
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Tim Bridge Nov 11
Replying to @pattern_monster
Nice
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Tim Bridge Nov 11
So remember in Elf when they introduced a Santa-hating, ultra-violent, Park-only police force to the plot? Why didn’t we say anything?
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Tim Bridge Nov 6
When you bring pasta salad to a potluck and everyone loves the pasta salad so much they completely ignore you.
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Tim Bridge retweeted
Ben Rosen Nov 5
“are you telling me these crimes were committed by Grindelwald?”
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