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God
I'm God. The Almighty. The father of Jesus. Friend of Buddha (honestly).
863
Tweets
803
Following
181
Followers
Tweets
God 15 Oct 17
Replying to @TheTweetOfGod
Seriously ?
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God 11 May 12
Lots of people blaming me for all the rain. Not my fault people. Well, not entirely.
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God 3 Apr 12
And I said let there be motorways, and there was motorways, and I saw that it was good (except the m25)
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God 1 Apr 12
And I said, let there be beer, and there was beer, and I saw that it was good.
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God 30 Mar 12
Could be delays getting fuel deliveries. Not because of strikes, but as everyone is panic buying, the tankers have run out of petrol
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God 23 Mar 12
Outnumbered... How do you think I feel?
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God 21 Mar 12
Lots of people praying for it, now it's official S Club 7 reforming. Sorry, I did my best to answer the prayers but couldn't stop them.
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God 21 Mar 12
George Osborne praying not to be beaten up about the UK . Sorry mate, can't help you there.
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God 20 Mar 12
Buddha wants to play poker tonight. I'm not sure, he has this knack of getting lucky hands, and keeps rubbing his belly, quite off putting.
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God 20 Mar 12
Message from Walt Disney: "Umm, about John Carter... WTF???"
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God 20 Mar 12
RT : Knock knock ........ Who's there?
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God 19 Mar 12
Yes Adele, you album sold big. Please stop saying Oh My God, you will actually wear my name out. Good album though.
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God 16 Mar 12
I can't tell you the number of times I've heard the words "Dear God" and "Bill Roache" in the same sentence. Be lucky you're not everywhere!
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God 16 Mar 12
Replying to @Queen_UK
it is. Gin can solve ALL problems. I'm surprised Syria aren't running it through their taps. I know a fella who can do that...
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God 16 Mar 12
Message from Steve Jobs. "The 'New iPad' is a crap name... I'd have called something much better, like 'The Newest iPad'.... or something"
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God 16 Mar 12
Prayer from Arch Bishop. "Dear God, I quit!"
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God 16 Mar 12
RT : Dear God, please forgive me because I'm gonna sin like a mother fucker this weekend.
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God 16 Mar 12
Prayer from Brian Dowling "Please god don't let them ruin my hair. It takes fucking ages to get it like this"
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God 15 Mar 12
I think I shall rest tomorrow, since I've been doing that for nearly.... several years now.
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God 29 Feb 12
I invented that.
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