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Fake Library Statistics
Tweets from a real librarian. Not currently wearing a cardigan.
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Fake Library Statistics 3h
Replying to @jeremiahgraves
Can I visit MIT and just spend the day hunting for Honey’s?
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Fake Library Statistics 3h
40% of librarians have had to ask a patron to not do something so absurd in the library that none of their family or friends believe them
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Fake Library Statistics 15h
48% of library security systems are simply a lady at the front desk giving everyone a stink eye
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 19
52% of librarians have been kicked out of a bookstore
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 18
Replying to @mjthomas43
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 18
Librarian-philosophers still debate today which came first, the library's use of tiny pencils or the tiny pockets in cardigans?
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 18
Replying to @KerrBearLib
Extra bergamot Earl Gray is the correct answer here, folks
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 17
Replying to @gumnos @UND_CFLibrary
Count me out. A kid pointed at a hole in a wall today and told me that’s where’s the zombies live
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 17
Strongest Held Librarian Opinions
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 16
44% of the conversations overheard in a library were not worth the effort to eavesdrop
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 14
☺️
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 14
49% of librarians have purposefully missheved a book so only they know where to find it
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 14
Replying to @tigerbellflower
Wow. That is a big difference.
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
Replying to @AngieRachels
Don’t worry. They will happen as soon as it can.
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
Replying to @thirdguess
He’s been dubbed Moonpie
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
Replying to @SunnyDayEternal
He was definitely underfed but he’s making up for that quickly
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
Someone abandoned this little guy at an outreach site this week. Guess who has a new kitty?
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
Replying to @FakeLibStats
In full disclosure I own a giant, yellow pencil similar to this
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
Even this won’t ensure that your ref desk pencils are safe from thieves
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Fake Library Statistics Jul 13
90% of librarians will begin every patron interaction today with, "Yes, I did know today is Friday the 13th."
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