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Chip Clark
They have the Internet on computers, now? --Homer Simpson
2,492
Tweets
1,311
Following
882
Followers
Tweets
Chip Clark 5h
Is that a good damn or a bad damn? (Asking for a friend)
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Chip Clark 12h
Fact check: True!
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Chip Clark May 14
Evidently the surgeon general's warningI I have tattoo'd on my arm is not effective. More preventative measures will be rolled out soon.
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Chip Clark May 8
Seems like a Gallo is a Poscast worthy stat.
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Chip Clark May 7
I'm three drinks in - let's race tomorrow.
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Chip Clark May 7
I was a history major until I realized there was no future in it.
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Chip Clark May 5
Just to make it crystal clear, I'm putting on my glasses.
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Chip Clark May 4
's dad joke game is strong
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Chip Clark May 3
Solid choice. My chicken Marsala is extremely rubbery
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Chip Clark May 2
I just lost my job printing calendars - I took some days off.
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Chip Clark Apr 30
Looks like my Followers number has spiked. In the spirit of transparency, a reminder - I'm just a random dude who tweets dad jokes. Direct your tweets for free stuff to
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Chip Clark Apr 27
Fact: I always offer breakfast.
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Chip Clark Apr 27
Good news, I'm extending my hours in May!
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Chip Clark Apr 25
Sorry about that. I am curious though... was it my profile pic or the dad jokes?
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Chip Clark Apr 24
Crap, what have I done now? Candy, flowers or is it jewelry bad?
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Chip Clark Apr 23
Due to overwhelming demand, I've instituted a lottery system. Ernst & Young will announce the winners every Tuesday at 12:00 PDT.
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Chip Clark Apr 23
Well, this is embarrassing. I thought the date was tomorrow.
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Chip Clark Apr 19
Replying to @TheIsaiahPhilo
Well... I am verifiable.
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Chip Clark Apr 18
I just want to put on the record that I do have surgeon general's warning tatoo that clearly states that addiction is a possibility.
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Chip Clark Apr 17
Heartbroken
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