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Approved News 6
US Military Goes to DEFCON 1 as End of 2016 Approaches
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Illuminati Declares "Case WISTFUL CRANE;" Orders All Units Activated
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◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢ Dec 31
jesus, FINALLY
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Council of Twelve Raises "Threat Condition Mottled Taupe," Readies Oneiric Strike Teams
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Forbidden Lands Shadow Council Performs Somber Dance Upon the Moor, Deploys Team of Wise Sea Captains With Mysterious Pasts
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Blood-Soaked Maidens of the Cold Sword Declare "SITUATIO HAERESIS MAGNA DOLOROSA," Order All Battallions to Readiness
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: "Think of the Children," Report Concerned Parents, Readying Thinkpiece Brigade, Barricading Entrance to PTA Conference Room
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Newslords Declare "News Condition Impending Scoop;" Command News Engines Brought to Full Power
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Charles J. Bloodhorn International Charities Declares "Code TEARFUL INFANT," Readies Long-Range Nuclear Philanthropy Fleet
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Kamina Lamperouge Dec 31
"You get a nuke, and you get a nuke, and YOU get a nuke!"
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Years Eve: Bone Sorceress Supreme Samedra Thunderflange Issues Ominous Pronouncement, Prepares Epic Bone Ritual
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: South Florida Declares "Sitch HUNGRY GATOR," Recalls Coke Dealers to President's Apartment
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
New Year's Eve: Nameless Corporation in Ruins of New York Declares "Stage Imminent Opportunity," Ramps Up Symbiote Implantation
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
BREAKING: Sun Appears In Sky At All Points On Earth, Growing Brighter With Each Passing Second
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
D.C. in Chaos as Beating of Wings Drowns Out All Other Sounds
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
Obama, Surrounded by Blood-Red Ravens, Bursts Through Roof of White House, Wielding Whalebone Scepter
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
"Single Blinding Figure" Seen in Sky Over D.C., Wings "of Fire & Light" Stretching "Miles in Every Direction"
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
Screaming Soundlessly, Obama Unleashes Full Power of Presidency, Obelisks Against Radiant Figure in Sky
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
BREAKING: RADIANT FIGURE IN SKY INCINERATES PRESIDENT OBAMA, WHITE HOUSE WITH SINGLE CONTEMPTUOUS GESTURE
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Approved News 6 Dec 31
Oregon City: At "Terrible Cost," Bone Sorceress Supreme Deploys Spell of Infinite Compulsion to Conscript Entire State Into Epic Bone Ritual
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